Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Ad Nausium

It's Super Tuesday, and the mudslinging is at a fever pitch - not among the politicians, but from the voters. "I'm sick of politics!" cries the voter as we face only the second month of a presidential election year. Maybe it's more than a coincidence that Super Tuesday landed on Fat Tuesday. Everybody's going to need a few days of quiet after this is all over.

If it seems like the election seasons get longer every time, you're right. Primaries and caucuses keep getting moved earlier until one fears we will soon be in a state of perpetual politicking. This only adds to the political fatigue that falls over much of the country year after year where presidential elections are followed by special elections followed by state congressional elections followed by another special election followed by the election to decide if the touch screen voting machine will actually count my vote or take me to a porn web site. In Indiana political ads seem to rule the TV 11 months of the year.

These ads crack me up. The advisors who cook these things up assume anyone of any intelligence is reading the newspapers and the candidate's web site and following the election process through sources that offer more than a 20 second sound bite. Therefore, TV ads need only to appeal to the lowest possible denominator. Notice I said lowest possible denominator, not common denominator. These guys don't even try to take the pulse of the TV viewer; they just assume we're all brain dead. As a result Indiana viewers are subject to a bevy of political ads featuring the candidate standing in a cornfield holding a basketball. No, I am not being facetious. Check it out yourself. Every Indiana political ad has the candidate holding a basketball. I think it's the law over there or something.

Ohio is not much better. I was once informed through a TV ad that I should vote for someone because he was the captain of his high school wrestling team. Other candidates make similar claims showing blurry home video of the winning touchdown they scored. Now I'm not suggesting heading a wrestling team is trivial, but I'm not sure how this experience was meant to instill in me any confidence that this candidate was ready to make decisions regarding Ohio's budget.

If we're going to judge our candidates based on their high school records I'd much rather vote for the kid who washed out in every sport in the school. He's the guy who aced the poli-sci final and wrote a term paper in history class on the U.S. economic policies in the 20th century. He could balance the state's budget and figure out how to fund our schools on his home computer. I'd love to see this guy's TV ad.

Hello Ohio, I'm Smedly Nerdwuss. I never dated a girl the entire time I was in high school.

I'd vote for him in a heartbeat.


Anonymous said...

Don't forget the stained glass window, family photo (dog included) and a stroll through a field, near farm equipment or through a factory to show how in touch they are with the "common man".

Steve said...

I always wonder how many takes they had to shoot to get the congressman jumping off the John Deere without falling on his ass.

Anonymous said...

It was probably a body double making the jump. Film the double from the back while making the jump and then follow with a jump cut to the candidate's face. lol